Change

When a cashier gives me back change I find myself merely throwing it in the bottom of my purse. Often times if it is just a few cents I find myself leaving it on the counter for someone that perhaps is a few cents short. Every now and then I saunter past Abe as he stares up at me. Disregarding the luck that he may bring. Over the holidays I began thinking about change. It all stemmed from a little game between my niece and my dad. Pops would put a coin in his hand and ask Livie to guess the hand. Livie would tap one of Pop's hands. Her face lit up when the coin appeared; however, if the coin didn't appear she would giggle and simply tap his other hand. Again the joy would come back to her eyes. Later she came up to me and asked me if I had any change. I dug through my purse and found a pound from my summer trip to the UK. I was so excited to explain how far that piece of change had traveled. I explained how I had to get on a plane and fly to a far off place. I told her how a real queen lived in a castle and that I strolled through her garden. I then handed her the pound. I thought she would cherish it, but to her it mattered none where it had come from. She was merely eager to play with her change. After a few minutes, the pound was dropped behind the couch. She asked me for some more change, but this time a quarter because it was bigger. I laughed to myself and dug through my purse to find Livie Lou some more change.

In the past year, my life has change immensely. I have also seen great change in others. My friends have given birth to precious girls. My dear sweet cousin and friend have vowed to spend their lives with the men they love. I have watched a friend gracefully accept sobriety. A dear friend will soon embark on her career inspiring others and reforming an education system by merely caring about her students. I have met the love of my life, moved in with him and now promised to live a happily ever after with him. There is so much change going around. I now sit wondering what change is to come. Perhaps a move back to my hometown, perhaps having to leave the home here I have created on Guilford, perhaps having to leave a career that I have invested 9 years in. Part of me is filled with angst and wonder. I then am reminded of Livie. Why can't I treat life's change like Livie? It doesn't matter where it has been, its history, its worth, it is merely change to be played around with. To be held in your hand until comfort is found with it and the change is lost, only to be replaced with more change, and perhaps even bigger change. The change I have gone through so far, and that I have witnessed in others this year allows me to breathe for a moment...giggle and simply tap the other hand.